Barry-Roubaix: Killer Gravel Road Race

The Barry-Roubaix 65 mile race is billed as a very hilly, tough course, so I thought that meant hilly for southern Michigan, which would be like two hills. I paid no attention to the posted 4000+ feet of elevation change in the profile for this two loop course, or the mile of gnarly, sandy two-track in preparing for the ride. My plan was to play domestique to Alaina by pulling as much as I could as long as I could on the tough parts of the course and help her try to podium.

4 hours of these hills.

The day was frigid. We started at 23F with 9mph winds, and by the time I finished it was all the way up to 30F with 12-17mph wind. All the racers were totally covered in balaclavas, neoprene shoe covers, lobster gloves, todos, and these were hardman riders on beautiful CX and mountain bikes.

We lined up with the ~150 other 65 mile racers (there were 23 and 35 mile options as well for 1,000 total cyclists), and the peloton absolutely rocketed off the line. As we exited the park, struggling to hang on to the back of the group, I noticed Alaina visibly not feeling well and knew it would be a very tough day.

Back of the pack and barely holding on.

The two track started a few miles from the start and went straight up. With sand, exposed rock, frozen puddles, and relentless undulations, this was a quad massacre. When you finally escape this section, you’re treated with a mix of short, steep climbs and long rolling hills. There is NOTHING flat at all on this course.

The gnarly two track. Many people walked their bikes.

Alaina and I hung together as the front riders of later waves passed us by absolutely hammering up hills and down descents alike. Now I know we’re not the best cyclists or anything, but at most HIMs, we’re usually the ones passing. Here, that was quite rare. Mmm, humble pie, you are so bitter yet so full of truth.

Alaina just behind me, both struggling for air.

By mile 20, Alaina was really suffering in the gut parts, so she told me to go on as she’d retire after one 35 mile loop. I was feeling great considering the conditions, so I pulled out my Superman cape to see what I could do with the bike training I’d put in over the winter. Confidence was very high. Much too high.

I'm King of the World!

We averaged 16.3 mph over the first hour and a half, so when I ratcheted up the next hour solo to average 18.8 mph for that interval, what the hell was I expecting except pain and slamming my head into the wall? The second loop was lonely and windy. The hills crushed me. Around mile 50 I had this overwhelming feeling that I wasn’t going to finish. ONLY 50 MILES! I did a frackin Ironman last year! But this course was harder than Lake Placid, albeit much shorter. Plus I haven’t done a ride much over 3 hours at all this year. I underestimated this course and how tough it is to race on dirt. That and I couldn’t eat a lot because my hands were frozen. I went straight down to the pain cave.

Getting lonely out there

Every mile crawled by on the edge of a straight razor. I ate a banana and finished my carb/gatorade mix. Nothing helped. I got re-passed by everyone I flew by when I thought I knew so much about riding. I saw stars and felt my head float away on a balloon string while ball-peen hammers pounded my quads. It was utterly excruciating.


And after a long, dark time, it was over. 4 hours and 1 minute later I crept out of a blackness I haven’t been to in a long long time. Alaina was there with a couple of Founders Centennial IPAs. And I didn’t really even want it. That’s how I knew I was in a bad bad place. I’d like to say I learned a valuable lesson here, but I bet I’ll make this mistake at least once more this season.

After eating a taco and heating up in the car, I took on human form again. We hung out on the beach near the bonfires, drank some IPA, and won a few raffle prizes: a Barry-Roubaix shirt, a jar of bike salve, bag of steel cut oats, and a great book mapping the dirt roads in our county. Cool!

Now it's time to get this season started! Please send us some warm weather :)